The Evil Eye is Not the Stink Eye

John Lett (About) (Sessions) (tarotworldtour YouTube)

My own "hamsa," purchased in Istanbul, May 2012.

My own “hamsa,” purchased in Istanbul, May 2012.

For a long time, I have been wanting to tackle the broad subject of the Evil Eye, or more generally, the cultural handling of showing gratitude. It seems particularly relevant with the end-of-year holiday season which places great emphasis on gratitude.

There has been much debate and discussion about the use of the hashtag #blessed in social media in North America and Australia. Many people are wishing to express their gratitude for good fortune, while others point to the watering down of the actual meaning of the word, which refers to holiness, or worse, the implication that “I am on God’s side and am being rewarded, while someone less fortunate may have somehow asked for it.”

As a Midwestern American, I did not realize the emphasis on public display of gratitude in my culture, which stems from the general religious outlook in this part of the world, and is part economics. I continually feel compelled to publicly express how grateful I am for great co-workers, family, a happy event, or to just have an overall pleased countenance, but I also have some reservations after what I have experienced in the world, particularly in Greece, Turkey, and Eastern Europe.

The first time I experienced this withholding of exuberant behavior was in Poland, which is probably one of the most underrated countries in the world on the traveling circuit (it’s affordable for tourists, has remarkable architecture in many places, and there’s interesting food). I was particularly happy at that time because I had just finished my undergraduate degree, so I was smiling at lots of people, particularly children and trying to indicate admiration for families, because in my experience in the US, people appreciate “approval” from strangers over how cute their kids are or if they excel at something. The reaction I got in return was not disapproval or worry, but Polish people did not really know how to take it – the expressions were something akin to “I wonder what he wants or thinks is so special about this everyday scene.” At a 750th charter anniversary celebration in Krakow in June 2007, I noticed the crowd was very reserved though everyone was enthralled with the concert. I was raving about it at the youth hostel later that night and the staff had a watery-eyed reaction that suggested a sense of validation, but responded with polite but terse “We are so happy to hear that” but no gesticulating or further comments.

Much of Asia is this way as well, but I did not really begin to understand it until I went to Turkey and Greece five years later. The caution was exacerbated in Greece by the depths of the financial crisis that year.

“As an American, the object is to be seen as generous to others but at the same time keep the focus on one’s individuality and sole accomplishments.”

In Turkey, I started seeing the hand emblem or amulet on a lot of jewelry (pictured above, the hamsa) and a black eye surrounded by blue. I had heard of the “evil eye” all my life and thought that it was something like a Sicilian curse. While variants of that do exist and all kinds of cultures and religions have appropriated or misappropriated it, I would say that a broader application of that is a general “don’t draw attention to yourself – doing so will cause you bad luck.” In Turkey, which was doing very well economically at the time (though Syria was a worry already), I often said to Turkish people “You have such a happy country.” “What?!” I would hear. People would then conjure up any kind of negative point on the country they could, though if I said anything in kind, the one major point that people would get defensive with is any observation of collectivism or stronger family ties. As an American, the object is to be seen as generous to others but at the same time keep the focus on one’s individuality and sole accomplishments.

A few weeks later in Greece, I landed in Athens where I knew a few people who were pickpocketed within a matter of days, I could not get money out of an ATM at times, and there was a deflationary depression going on with 25% unemployment. There were many places I went that were unsafe. And yet the sun perpetually shines there, it’s remarkably beautiful, and so where there is a glimmer of “hope,” oftentimes Americans will try the Pollyanna approach – or at least a number of them will and I am among them – and thus think that their will and prayers can overcome the darkness. Very little of what I have experienced in the abundance of the US contradicts this, and when circumstances are lean, we are trained to double down and smile even brighter until it becomes believable. This has always worked for me. However, in Greece, it brought trouble, suspicion, and oftentimes it is why Americans do not seem trustworthy or sincere to people from different backgrounds.

As soon as I was smiling and joking with other tourists in a way that was maybe too ostentatious, someone mentally deranged would come shouting in our direction. At a cafe, somehow the barista started talking about the economy in Greece when he indicated that he makes €1,200 a month for full-time work, net, in a city where the rent is now around €300-350 a month. I responded that this was great and he has done very well for himself and he stepped back, stupefied as to how to respond. Again, bad luck to call too much attention to good fortune when so many are suffering.

In countries with unstable governments or irregular tax collection, one also needs to discriminate how and when to show off because that can draw the attention of auditors or other types of retribution.

In other climes, such as in northern Europe, it is also not appreciated to express too much gratitude or point out one’s attributes or good fortune. There are many reasons for this, but I suspect that the biggest is economics. In the deregulated environment of the US, one has to constantly attract in order to be seen as a viable, relevant “product.” In deregulated Asia, this is mainly expressed through keeping up physical appearances but not crossing the line into standing out. In extroverted US, declarative statements and professing of otherness is required in order to hold market share (so long as one does not become too marginalized), which has applications in all spheres of our lives. Though western Europe is rapidly Americanizing in this sense (I started noticing pharmaceuticals in advertisements there in 2012 for the first time, and changes in consumer preferences as well as advertising), there is still resistance toward the striving for attention that characterizes American culture because the enlarged public sector and emphasis on cultural institutions makes that behavior less of a necessity.

In no way do I think that any of the shades of showing gratitude or not showing it are fundamentally wrong. Though I have a strong cultural preference for itemizing the reasons I am thankful, I can no longer do so without reservations. Is a highly optimistic, grateful approach one that uplifts everyone and builds stronger community, or simply a way of building a platform to draw more positive attention to ourselves?

John Lett (About) (Sessions) (tarotworldtour YouTube)

Advertisements
This entry was posted in Uncategorized and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

3 Responses to The Evil Eye is Not the Stink Eye

  1. Lisa Falour says:

    Brilliant essay.

    In six decades of travel, work and study here and there, with many peoples, I’ve learned to keep my eyes to myself, not to wave hello, never to comment on a cute child or great fortune, and I still often put forth rather somber comments, which is quite in line with my American Pennsy Dutch type upbringing.

    I had Chinese clients in NYC USA, no mean feat, and had to accept I’d never get a “thank you” from them, no matter what great good I had done them. The fact that they had no problems with my doing business with them had to suffice.

    In France, I learned to glance super-quickly at something I thought was great, look AWAY, then back at the senior person and say, “Masha Allah.” (Allah has allowed it.) THIS is always met with a huge thank you! Among other French and many Europeans and Scandinavians, correct formalities for contact must be followed, but if I am “myself,” I seem nutty to them. Among Finns, smiling might get you labeled as very weird.

    I love the glass black, white and blue talisman I got in Turkey and the hand you have, I know as “the hand of Fatima.” The wise daughter of the Prophet Muhammed always guided his decisions. Her hand is seen as auspicious in every way. In some places in North Africa, the lizard or salamander is also seen as wonderfully lucky.

    The “evil eye” exists in a huge number of cultures. I “read” my coffee grounds in Turkey, for fun, as people do, and put it on YouTube. Someone commented they saw a hedgehog there. I asked what that meant. They said I had attracted the evil eye. I certainly had! 2010 was my Hell Year. I started out so happy and it was too obvious to too many people. At home, work, with family, friends and contacts, administrations and strangers, the attacks began.

    I never did forget THE GOOD EARTH by Pearl S. Buck. The couple is so happy with their son, and one parent says, “He is cute!” and the other looks fearfully at the skies and shouts, “But too bad he is covered with pox!” The other chimes in, “Yes, it is such misfortune for us!” They were tempting fate!

    Even by letting it slip we are “good at something,” we invite backstabbers. “French discretion” is interesting to me. Most with wealth show no outward signs of it. Very personal talk and sharing, business deals and other things, might be in private or only during “the cheese course” at a meal!

    I am often reminded of the American Beats, or beatniks. They felt things would be nuked any moment (in fact, there was just a horrible nuke disaster in the Ukraine this week and Fukushima has rendered us all toast), so didn’t see much point in worrying too much, but also, it was such a generally prosperous time (“you can make it if you work hard here”), they could AFFORD to “drop out.” With many, it was an affectation and no more.

    Americans only need look back at raw research historical materials to find that these are not our first hard times by any means. Have a look at the life of the American average worker in the 1920s, and the 1890s in the USA, for example. Standard history books either tend to purposely mislead, or they are just inaccurate, I find. American behavior has been possible for awhile but may no longer be. Views such as yours are illuminating.

    • Lisa, unless there is a grievous error in the making, you can expect something in the mail in about 10-12 days, part of its contents related to this post.

      I personally do get swept up in the “loud” gratitude of the US. As I also wrote here, this is what is familiar from my background and continues to be rewarded. Something you have both written and said in previous videos about being “dumb” in your dealings in the past struck a chord with me because the world of American film and advertising supports this glossy reality. We can manifest it by speaking it into being but not in every part of the world.

  2. Pingback: All Eyes on Putin and Russia: Encounters on the Ground | Sorcery

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s